Rhymes of our times - a daily poem - a lighthearted, but sometimes grumpy look at our life and times, featuring: Humour, Politics, Health, Family, Sport, Business, Royalty, Satire, Adventure, Environment, Crime, World, Technology, Idols, Obituaries, Religion, Arts, Children, Parenting, Law, Nature, Education, Fashion, War

written daily by poet Tony Hemmings since 11th October 2001

02 September 2005

Poems of the past 30 days

A month of news captured in verse

Poet: Tony Hemmings

14th Aug 08
BEIJING OLYMPICS HALFWAY

The Beijing Olympics are now in full flow -
A Media maelstrom - each nation to show
The progress of each of their glorious team
Competing with all of the global cream.

The quest is for gold like the Holy Grail,
Fanatical fighters fearing to fail,
Mighty heroics in all of the games,
But the friendly fish Phelps is the top of the names.

With China and Russia and USA,
Fighting it out whatever the play,
But great little Britain is trying its best,
As gold for a swim and a cycle attest.

15th Aug 08
BENEFITS EXPOSED

Britain is plagued with its benefits law,
Paying out billions, a scam to deplore,
With so many mischievous, fraudulent claims,
Genuine claimants the fiddle enflames.

These are the dregs of the welfare state,
Taking advantage of cash on the plate,
Feigning a weakness of body or mind,
Fooling the doctors who casually signed.

So easy to say one’s not very well,
Druggies and boozers find stories to tell -
Time for a separate medical test
For those who are work-shy or having a rest.

16th Aug 08
DREADED PREMIER LEAGUE AGAIN

Alas, the Premier League again,
The Media ply a pervasive pain,
With sheer saturation of soccer obsessed,
Creating a country sorely possessed.

Pages and hours of soccer-mad views,
Players and managers mad when they lose,
Pictures of cheating, cheering and hate,
Of spitting and holding – a shame to debate.

Britain is gripped by this ludicrous craze,
Armchair spectators wasting their days.
When soccer results are regarded as news
Of daily importance, the Nation must lose.

17th Aug 08
FOUR YEAR OLDS TOLD TO TRY HARDER

“I have to try harder, that’s what I’m told –
A little bit harsh when I’m four years old,
But the Ofsted inspector is not very nice –
A word to my parents would surely suffice.

I’m doing my best to read and to write
But maybe I’m not especially bright.
The nursery class is really good fun –
We have a good play when all said and done,

But what does this stupid inspector expect –
A major improvement with instant effect?
What did he do when he was my age –
Act like a bully and fly in a rage?”

18th Aug 08
POOR HOLIDAYMAKERS IN UK

Pity the holidaymakers this year,
A terrible August with many a tear,
Cooped up in a caravan, cottage or tent,
Wondering when the rain will relent.

Trickling drops on the window pane,
Trying to be happy but feeling the strain,
Family dramas from morning till night,
Such a disaster, but oh what a plight,

Only the cinema, Scrabble or book,
Mum in a frenzy, peacekeeper, cook.
Game after game but the children are bored,
Next year for God’s sake, we’re going abroad.

19th Aug 08
PEDIGREE DOGS IN THE FIRING LINE

Pedigree dogs in the firing line,
More about models and modern design
Than the genes of more than a century breed,
Such glorious specimens going to seed.

Incestuous mating freely condoned,
The Kennel Club claiming they’re cleverly cloned,
Crufts is a showcase for signs of disease,
Bringing the thoroughbred world to its knees

As animals suffer in body and mind,
Their bones are contorted and some are near blind,
The breathing is laboured, the flab is in folds,
Prone to distemper, fitting and colds.

20th Aug 08
ANTS ON THE RAMPAGE

The country is plagued by a mountain of ants,
Indoors and outdoors and maybe your pants,
Enjoying the dampness of Britain in spate,
The beasts are emerging to sting and to bate,

Churning up lawns with little brown heaps,
Wings on the midges to give you the creeps,
Or under the sink or the washing machine,
Scampering round as the busiest scene.

How can the insect cause such disdain,
Not like a wasp that can cause you such pain,
But ants are industrious, working the floor,
Stamp on them, spray them, they’ll come back for more.

21st Aug 08
PAIN

In everyone’s life there will sometimes be pain,
For most of us life is a constant strain,
Confronting the challenges presented each day,
Driving the mind and the body astray.

The physical side of pain is clear,
To every single mortal a fear
That something will fail in the fallible frame,
By wretched disease or accident maim,

But mental fragility equally lurks
And the pain in the brain most dreadfully hurts,
But how does one tolerate pain in the raw?
Only by faith and to hold Him in awe.


22nd Aug 08
FADED GLITTER

Glitter, the paedophile, came out of jail,
Convicted in Thailand, a miserable tale
Of molesting young virgins, a sickness indeed,
One of the stricken, perverted breed.

No-one would have him and so he returned
Back to his country but totally spurned,
Judged by his dirty and heinous acts,
The media wantonly bleeding the facts.

Gary the Glitter has shattered his name
But hard to be humble when riddled with fame –
Let the beast languish but leave him alone,
Into the annals of infamy blown.

23rd Aug 08
AIR CRASH

Shudder to think of a crash of a plane,
One hundred and fifty were killed in Spain
By a takeoff aborted just as it rose,
A hell of all hells in the final throes.

Everyone caught in a ball of fire,
But a number were saved from the blazing pyre.
How could anyone come out alive
But this was a miracle one couldn’t contrive.

An utter catastrophe but what was the cause?
A mechanical failure or servicing flaws,
A piloting error or terrorist act?
The case will be solved but the system has cracked.

24th Aug 08
BEIJING OLYMPICS COME TO AN END

The Beijing Olympics have come to an end,
At the closing ceremony more millions to spend,
Twenty odd billions the total amount,
And too many people on duty to count.

Proud of their bird’s nest, home of the track,
An icon forever when looking aback.
The Games have eluded the terrorist gang,
The praises of China by IOC sang.

Britain excelled with nineteen gold.
With pride in achievement, confident, bold,
London prepares for another four years,
To stage the Olympics amidst all the cheers.

25th Aug 08
PROMS FOREVER

Thank God for the dream of Sir Henry Wood,
Conceiving the Proms, his legacy stood,
His bust looking down in the Albert Hall
On keen promenaders who rise to the call,

Thanks to our venerable BBC,
The mix of the programmes to oversee,
The classical repertoire truly displayed
By the finest musicians, exquisitely played.

To lovers of music on hot Summer nights
Exposed to orchestral and choral delights
By willing conductors inspired by the throng,
Keeping our classical music strong.


26th Aug 08
FARMERS IN TROUBLE

Pity the farmers once again,
Trying to harvest but foiled by the rain -
The bright golden fields are losing their glow,
Fading to beige to the farmers’ woe.

The harvester booked on a rainy day,
The money for renting it thrown away,
Most of the goodness has gone from the grain,
Only a matter of days remain

Before all the crops will be turning to dust,
No intervention divine to trust,
Sadly resigned to accept what will be,
The farmers’ lot is a lottery.

27th Aug 08
COLD WAR LOOMING CLOSER

Russia is playing it hard with the West,
Putin and Medvedev bent on a quest
For promoting the rights of breakaway states,
Loyal to Russia, so trouble awaits.

Europe and NATO are up in arms
At bullyboy Russia, with plenty of qualms
Of what the intentions of Putin might be,
The icy-blue-eyed of the KGB.

From Ossetia now they refuse to withdraw,
This is their way to settle a score –
So many countries were lost to the West,
Time for the balance to be redressed.

28th Aug 08
DANGERS OF CHILDBIRTH

The birth of a child is anyone’s guess,
Still not a science of total finesse,
Each birth is a miracle, thanks be to God,
Where never before have the parents trod,

For previous births are never the same,
The forces of Nature you never can tame,
A post partum haemorrhage, a difficult breech,
A twisted cord not easy to reach,

A terrible shock to mother and child,
Nothing in birth is regarded as mild,
Except for a Caesar, but still there’s a scar,
But with the first cry you know where you are.

29th Aug 08
SELLING A HOUSE

Selling a house today is a mess,
Buyers and sellers are under duress,
The market is falling no wonder why
That no-one in Britain is wanting to buy.

Trying to be hopeful but caught in a chain,
The promise to buy is made in vain,
For what are the chances that all will agree –
All may collapse in adversity.

The trading of homes has come to a halt,
The crunching of credit is claimed as the fault,
Times or recession are fuelling the fire,
And the selling of houses is bound to be dire.

30th Aug 08
EXPLORATION

There are still many places on earth to explore –
A human, by nature, desires to know more
Of life in our universe, far and beyond,
The secrets of Nature as still as a pond,

Waiting for man to discover at last,
Like Scott and Columbus, names of the past,
Those with the courage to face the unknown,
Crossing the boundaries all on their own.

The forests and mountains, the tundra and Poles,
The depths of the oceans and underground holes,
No need to bother with pouter space,
With much of our planet still to trace.

31st Aug 08
GOODBYE TO THE PUB

The old British pub is fading away,
Not enough customers willing to pay,
With the cost of fuel and utility bills,
Hit by the credit crunch, cutting out frills.

Bad enough paying for every day food,
Increasing each day, depressing the mood
For going out daily down to the pub
For a drink with the pals as a happy free club.

Now people are staying at home to save,
And driving with alcohol leads to the grave,
The budget is strained at the price of a drink,
The pub without food is close to the brink.

1st Sept 08
NEW ORLEANS UNDER THREAT AGAIN

New Orleans is about to be struck
By Hurricane Gustav – again out of luck
Right in the way of the perfect storm,
In the twenty-first century becoming the norm,

All of the residents told to vacate
Ahead of its landfall – can it abate?
The top of the levees are topped by the surge,
The city is prone to this natural scourge.

Another Katrina would sink it for good,
Who would remain – but nobody would.
The Gulf is now warmer than ever before,
And hurricanes threaten to knock at the door.

2nd Sept 08
A DECENT WINE FOR £6.99

The experts decided on six ninety-nine
As a suitable price for a bottle of wine
For dinner for guests, no fortune to spend,
A sensible figure, no need to pretend

You know about wines, a great connoisseur,
Living the life of the bon viveur,
Simply a practical man of the house,
Impressing the guests with your competent spouse.

But bargains are there at three ninety-nine,
Half of their price at the end of the line,
Superstore deals to tempt you inside,
The wines of the world sat a pittance supplied.


3rd Sept 08
SELF DESTRUCT

A failure, embarrassed, and laden with debt,
A millionaire businessman caught in the net,
Driven alas to the depths of despair,
Like a fish out of water gasping for air –

The bailiffs were coming the following day
No chance anymore for a further delay,
The moment of truth had duly arrived -
He made his decision and no-one survived.

He shot both his wife and his daughter that night
To save them the pain of their subsequent plight,
Then shooting himself and torching his house,
All he had lived for – a miserable louse.

4th Sept 08
US ELECTION HYPE

Months on the fiery political trail,
Subjected to endless media hail,
The Republicans, Democrats battle it out,
Leaders and running-mates charging about.

A year of attrition by Press and TV –
Who is the likely winner to be?
So many experts voicing their view,
The Media trying to influence you,

Waiting to pounce and to vilify,
With personal jibes to crucify –
“Enough of the Media - leave us alone,
We’re capable voters to choose on our own.”

5th Sept 08
SITCOMS HAVE DIED

The sitcom is over for decades to come,
The versions today are boring and dumb,
Compared with the heyday of years ago,
When BBC triumphed show after show.

Dad’s Army, The Good Life, One Foot in the Grave
With Meldrew, then Butterflies, pleasure they gave,
Yes Prime Minister, ‘Till Death us do Part,
Some Mothers do ‘ave ‘em, the scriptwriters’ art.

Those were the days it was easy to laugh,
Next day revered by all of the staff,
But now it’s pathetic, the magic is lost,
It cannot be copied whatever the cost.


6th Sept 08
FLOODS IN THE UK

The floods are creating a terrible toll
On villages, towns, destroying their soul,
The banks of the rivers were forced to give way,
Allowing the waters to have their say

All over the country, swirling around,
Despoiling the houses, the fields and the ground,
Not a tsunami, hurricane, storm,
But relentless rain that’s becoming the norm.

As Britain reacts to the climate change,
Exposed to the Eastern Atlantic’s range,
Dumping its contents onto our isle,
Submitting our homes to permanent trial.

7th Sept 08
CULTURE IN BRITAIN

Culture is viewed in so many ways,
In music and literature, operas, plays,
In language and learning, science and design,
In furniture, films and art so fine,

In the structure of buildings, bridges and roads,
In history, religion and sporting modes,
In colour and customs and how we behave –
In a proper democracy, voters or slaves?

For two thousand years, Britain has grown
Into the greatest culture known,
But too many cultures are fighting for one –
Too cosmopolitan - the country is done.

8th Sept 08
MOTHERS BACK TO WORK OR NOT

A mother was born to look after her child –
In her arms and her care it is reconciled,
But when it is only at breakfast and night
For five days a week, the going is tight.

For mother and child, they both are in stress,
Many emotions she has to suppress,
Leaving her babe in the hands of a nurse –
The need for the money the modern day curse.

To stay with a newly born child is a must,
To earn its composure, happiness, trust –
A child with a carer is left in the dark,
Deprived and it leaves an indelible mark.

9th Sept 08
MURRAY LOSES TO FEDERER IN USA

Muscleman Murray was making his mark
With powerful performances matching his bark
Beating Nadal to the final goal
Of winning the Grand Slam and defying the poll.

Though Andy had clearly much improved,
The fivefold champion was not be moved –
Federer cleverly tightened the screw,
The master tactician, polished and true,

Demolishing Murray in three straight sets,
Calling the shots as the angry one frets,
But Murray, The Team, will return to the fray,
A victor to be on anther day.

10th Sept 08
BIG BANG IN SWITZERLAND

Big Bang in Geneva is finally ‘live’,
To reveal how we started and learnt to survive,
Billions of money on billions of years
Of evolving through Nature with thanks to our peers,

The scientists among us who rave at the test,
With the technical brains to absorb they are blessed,
Whilst most of us fail to comprehend
The meaning at all from beginning to end,

The Hadron Collider is set to proceed,
And particles crash at incredible speed,
Creating explosions of infinite power –
But the sceptics believe it’s our final hour.

11th Sept 08
SEVENTH ANNIVERSARY OF 9/11

Eleventh of September seven years ago,
America suffered a deadly blow
By the devils of Islam who wantonly kill,
Claiming the right of their Allah’s will.

Hijacking, murder, suicide fools,
Straight from Al Qaeda’s terrorist schools,
Blasting America out of the sky,
The hits of the century you cannot deny.

Three thousand died in a hideous hell,
As the planes and the skyscrapers fatefully fell,
But now it is over the traumas remain,
The curse of the devils to drive one insane.

12th Sept 08
COLLAPSE OF AN AIRLINE

XL collapsed in a heap of debts -
All of a sudden, the end of the jets
Flying their customers down to the Med,
And other resorts where tourists are led,

Leaving them stranded like whales on a beach,
Waiting for helpers but out of reach,
Some passengers having to pay to return,
But most of them haven’t a penny to burn,

And those who booked some months in advance,
Recouping their money’s a matter of chance,
Depending on how you originally paid –
A ridiculous state, the tourists betrayed.


13th Sept 08
CLASSICAL MUSIC

Compared with the pops, the Classics are small,
By no means the music appealing to all,
Only a fraction of recording sales,
But wonderful music that always prevails.

For hundreds of years the Classics have played,
The greatest composers with us have stayed
For all generations enthralled by their spell,
But for ears of the modern, some classics are hell.

Consider for all the Last Night of the Proms,
Designed for our children, the pops and the moms,
The interest, the passion, the Promers, the fun,
Bringing us all together as one.

14th Sept 08
MOVING HOUSE

Moving house is the ultimate stress,
Each room is a dump, an absolute mess
With boxes strewn all over the place,
Another day packing unable to face,

Surrendering all that cherished for years,
Enough to drive anyone sadly to tears,
Taking the pictures down from the wall,
The umbrella and hat from the stand in the hall,

The books from the shelves and the family clock,
A bitter experience, a terrible shock,
Farewell to the garden, the plants and the trees,
A new home to go to but not to appease.


Copyright 2008 Tony Hemmings

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